Oh No I Didn’t…

… I did.

I did what I said I wasn’t going to do this year. It only took… what… 31 days in the month of January?

I let self-doubt creep in. A new app almost sent me into a tailspin. I thought about… It’s hard to say it now… quitting.

This blogging world becomes a little more overwhelming the more you dive deeper… IF… this is what you believe you want to do. I’m researching conferences and collaborations… and don’t even get me started on Social Media (as if I need ONE MORE APP/TIME SPENT on my phone!).

I want to enjoy this process. I want to love it. I want to be proud of what I’m putting out there… but sometimes it seems like I’m caught up in just trying to keep up. There can be a fine line between drive and desperation… and desperation ain’t pretty.

… and then I find these gems…

… fellow bloggers… SUCCESSFUL bloggers who have felt and STILL feel the same way.

On Rue Daily (which you MUST check out BTW)… blogger Kris Schoels of Young Married Chic says:

“I think most bloggers would say the same thing- you reach a point where you question giving up blogging because (you think) no one is reading your site and you are wondering why you are doing it. If you push past that moment, I think you will find that amazing things can happen.”

Ok… I’m pushing… I’m pushing…

… and then I find this from Megan Gilger of The Fresh Exchange. She just attended a blogger conference and pretty much summed up what I felt about social media this week:

“The other thing I noticed was how much there is to keep up with. Write an editorial calendar, instagram this, hashtag it with these things, wear polka-dots, pitch an idea, create create create, give the impression it is all perfect, have a rate sheet, make original content, contribute. Then hello…Vine..! Yeah I have an account but I am scared to make a video…yeah silly I know. It concerned me for the lifestyle and design blogging community, because when were we finding time to just live the lifestyle we are exemplifying? Where is the time away from a screen? I began comparing and feeling as if I could not keep up with this.”

Bingo. Enter tailspin. 

Do I believe I can do this? Yes. Do I enjoy it? Yes… most of the time.

I just have to remember to care less about what I think people expect to see… and to…well… be me.

… and who am I? I’m definitely not a quitter . Never have been … never will be.

So just expect to see me here doin my thang…

… and follow me on facebook, twitter, instagram, pinterest and NOW vine (search Murphy Deesign).

… just please for the love of God App makers… leave it at that… for at least the next 6 months .