I must begin this post with one more shout out to Lamps Plus for awarding me a scholarship. I couldn’t have come across a more excited, genuine and all-around lovely group of people. My experience with you alone was worth the time spent away from work and family.
I must also ask each of you to grab a cup of coffee, a donut , a glass of wine (pick your poison)… because this post is not only a wrap up… it veers towards a state of the union address!
If you’ve been reading my posts recently… you will know that being chosen as a Lamp’s Plus Scholarship Winner couldn’t have come at a better time. I had been feeling overwhelmed and even a bit intimidated by this Big Bad Blogging world. Do you know there are now over 200 million blogs? WOWZA!
Hello… I’m Dee. I’m a blogger… can you hear me?
The sheer numbers themselves haven’t actually scared me off… but trying to establish my voice, believing in it… and in turn finding my audience (outside of my immediate family and friends) has left me in a puddle of self-doubt over the past month or two.
Don’t get me wrong… I haven’t been in the game long enough (less than a year) to warrant much sympathy… but all I needed was some inspiration. To quote myself from a previous post… “I want to enjoy this process. I want to love it. I want to be proud of what I’m putting out there… but sometimes it seems like I’m caught up in just trying to keep up. There can be a fine line between drive and desperation… and desperation ain’t pretty.”
Desperation… EW.
Yes Ew… but desperation, hunger, urgency… call it what you will… has been on the minds of many as of late.
Case in point… these two AMAZING critiques of the business of blogging, both from the month of February. One is a commentary on the Alt Summit by Megan Gilger of The Fresh Exchange. The other is a reaction by the fashion blogger The Man Repeller to Suzy Menkes’ “The Circus of Fashion in T Magazine” called “Blog Is A Dirty Word“. I will only quote a paragraph from each… but please read them in full, because what they have to say will probably resonate with each and every one of us… whether you are blogging about fashion, food, family or design.
Megan states: “When arriving at Alt I found a group of women searching. Searching for sponsors, connections, publicity, and maybe even a book deal. Though many of the panels were about finding your voice, opening shops, and branding yourself, I felt this odd pressure to be making my rounds to potential sponsors and I saw many others with this “hunger”. On many levels I don’t think it is wrong to be searching and working hard to land these things. As bloggers we have something to offer and we should be compensated, and I know I have done my fair share, but within that search I know personally that passion and perspective can become lost. I have seen it in myself. This ugly head rears. Watching all these talented ladies searching and “working it” made me personally question if this was a world I wanted to be in. I am not a sales person…I am a creative; someone that just wants to inspire and challenge myself, which isn’t that why we all begin blogs?”
Yes Megan Yes! But oh how nice it would be to be “rewarded” for our creativity, no? I myself have craved some recognition, some reward… but it is in seeking this that I fear hopping onto the proverbial hamster wheel and putting myself in peril of sacrificing authenticity. When you admire those who have achieved success… isn’t it the knee jerk reaction to try and do what those people are doing? (Note: Megan also has many wonderful things to say about Alt… so please read the article for her entire perspective.)
And on the flip side… what happens when your ACTUAL authenticity is called into question?
The Man Repeller states: “Last week, because of a comment on my favorite beauty product (which I have been purchasing–not being gifted–every two months for the last three years,) and the response to it, (“we get it, you’re sponsored by X,”), I found myself wondering if we, the bloggers, have entered an era where we can’t like anything without having our motives questioned. Yes, I concluded. Unfortunately we have. It has always been the subjectivity of fashion blogging that resonates so well. The raw portrayal of an unedited opinion will likely always command ample attention but there are only really a handful of bloggers who have been able to canon true influence and respect. It is at the point where readers can smell the sponsorship that integrity gets lost. And in this day and age, it seems that sprouting blogs are founded on principles of self-aggrandizement.”
Ouch! I don’t even have a sponsor yet… and this has already happened to me. Posting about products and companies in Los Angeles (where I have lived for over 20 years) gets me excited… and having a blog means I finally have a platform to share my excitement and experiences with said products and companies with an audience other than my friends and colleagues (who have sought out my advice on the subject). It smarts to be told I might have a motive other than just a pure love for what I’m speaking of.
What does this lengthy intro mean and how does it pertain to this conference? It means that just as the blogging world seems to have substantiated itself… the purity that was present at its creation is now being called into question… and it leaves a newbie like me walking into the Design Bloggers Conference with the heady task of securing a reason to stay involved.
Well I found a good reason… and I couldn’t be happier!
And the reason is YOU (isn’t that the lyric to a Hoobastank song?). You readers, suppliers, collaborators, co-bloggers, vendors, designers, key-note speakers (am I forgetting anyone?)!
You lovely, optimistic, in love with design, and sincere in your joy people! I know you are sincere. I’m from LA… I can spot a good performance from a mile away ;).
This is what I needed! To get out from behind my desk and to be among my people… without any posturing, pretending, or desperation involved. I regained some of the confidence I had lost, I am inspired, and dare I say… I am calm (Thank you Barbara Barry… more on her later).
To the new friends I have made… thank you. I can’t wait to collaborate and to keep sharing.
To all of the speakers… even though I can’t mention each and every one of you here (this post is already bordering on a novel… have you grabbed your second glass of wine yet?)… you all had something great for us to take away. The common thread? In the words of Sammy Davis Jr. “I gotta be me”. Barbara Barry could write a post a day on the beauty of a cucumber and we would all be enthralled. Could I do that? Um… no. My love of vegetables does not run as deep. But my cup runneth over with love for the beauty found in many other things. I will never be Barbara Barry. But I can be ME to the nth degree!
Two more takeaways and stick a fork in it… I’m done!
Susanna Salk… “The most successful and creative people are not afraid of sharing.”
I met Susanna almost a year ago when I first started this blog… I was only a few weeks in. Do you know what she did? She said yes to an interview and sent me hi-res pics of her books Be Your Own Decorator and Room For Children. Do you know how many people read that interview? Probably four people… my mom, my dad, my husband and my best friend. Do you think Susanna gave that a thought? Absolutely not. Because she’s a giver in the TRUEST sense of the word… and OMG is she successful.
Share… even if you don’t think someone will “get it”! Probably one of my favorite quotes of the conference? “Don’t take the existing landscape as a reason why or why not you should do something.”. Oh wow is this statement loaded. In its essence… I believe this means to bask in the glory of your original point of view. If you build it… “they” will come. They… meaning the people that will get you. And they are out there…
I believe that Susanna said that for every 1 person who doesn’t understand you… there are 500 who do. Share with them… and they will too.
Barbara Barry… “Design is not static… it is an experience”.
Coined the Design Dalai Lama by my conference buddy Erica Islas… Barbara literally brought the conference to a halt (and some people to tears).
As I watched some attendees furiously tweet out moment after moment of perfect sound bites… I couldn’t help (as well as others), but to put down my phone and my pen… and to just “experience” Barbara (oh that soft, soothing voice!).
It is this tug-of-war between the tactile and the virtual experience that sometimes throws me into a tailspin. Barbara is a beautiful reminder to slow things down when you need to… to get back to basics, to the ROOT of the experience. “Dust to dust” if you will.
She told me that when I feel victim to the frenetic pace of technology (which she often feels herself)… to “make a quieter offering”.
Namaste Barbara. Namaste.
I can’t think of a better place to end this dialogue. Just one more big THANKS to all of you for helping me to feel more calm and confident leaving the conference, than what I felt when I arrived.
I feel more grounded than ever… and you are the roots that have secured me.
xo
Dee
A few friendly faces from the Harbinger, Traditional Home, and Kravet closing party. (Photo credit: Amanda Reant, Sofa.com)
To infinity and beyond! A BIG part of who I am? A mom! This guy hitched a ride to the conference in my jacket pocket ;).
A recap video from the Lamps Plus team… love you guys!
